Lately I’ve been feeling weird about my body. Like ew, I don’t like it. Something I noticed was that I don’t really like my face without makeup anymore.
The reason why I chose to write about this on Wednesday is because this is when I would post about beauty products and things like that. Just like I wrote about summer bodies for my Swim Suit Horror Show post, I wanted to take some time to address my feelings, as others may be experiencing this too.
I love makeup. I think it is so fun to play around with and another outlet for me to be creative. However, one day recently I went out with a friend, just a casual shopping trip and felt really insecure about myself.
I just threw on a T-shirt and Jean shorts, no makeup, hair in a messy bun as usual. And I hated mirrors that day. This really caught me off guard. I mean, that’s how I used to go to school. And work. And even right now as I write this I’m sitting in shorts and a T-shirt, hair up in a bun.
That day in the dressing room I noticed how my skin tone is uneven. Blotchy I guess is a good word. My stomach punge was especially noticeable. I hated the way my jeans fit, and even when I tucked my shirt in (my ultimate power move), I still felt awful.
The next day, I threw on an extremely minimal look for work with my makeup, my work shirt, and jeans, and felt 10 tines better. So it got me asking myself “do I rely on makeup for confidence now?”
I thought about it for a little while, and yes. Maybe I do rely on some concealer and mascara to get me through the day. Maybe if eating better and doing more exercise to flatten my belly out a little bit will make me feel better. And that’s okay. I am all about body positivity. I think women of all shapes, sizes, abilities, and ethnicities are absolutely gorgeous. So I want to be positive about myself too.
People like to call women who wear a lot of makeup fake. Or get surgery, or wear wigs, or whatever they want fake because it isn’t necessarily “real”. Sure, my winged eyeliner is fake, but it’s cool af.
“You’re so pretty without makeup.”
“I don’t want you to think you need to wear makeup.”
“You don’t need to lose any weight.”
I know you mean well, but really as long as I’m healthy, I think I should just do whatever I want.
I was thinking maybe I should go on a diet buy now that I’m dressed, I think I wanna go get a millshake. That would make me REALLY happy.
If you’re feeling a little down and out this season, hit me up and let’s talk about it. Mt contact page is always open, and I’d love to chat with you. Stay safe out there and thanks for reading.
Peace, Emma Katy